In the quest for happiness, many of us strive for the perfect job, a fulfilling relationship, an ideal home, or financial freedom. Yet, do these external circumstances genuinely dictate our happiness? Recent findings from a comprehensive study led by renowned institutions suggest that they do not. Rather, our personalities play a pivotal role in determining our satisfaction with life. The study’s insights challenge conventional wisdom, proposing that changing our circumstances may not be as crucial as we once believed.

This research involved over 21,000 European and British adults, primarily from Estonia or ethnic Russians residing there. Participants evaluated their satisfaction across various life domains, including work, health, relationships, and finances. They also completed a detailed personality survey assessing several personality aspects, notably the “Big Five” traits: extroversion (outgoing and energetic), conscientiousness (efficient and organised), neuroticism (sensitive and nervous), agreeableness (friendly and compassionate), and openness to experience (inventive and curious). Additionally, the survey explored other personality facets, such as envy, competitiveness, loyalty, narcissism, and spirituality.

To mitigate bias, participants nominated someone familiar to them to assess their personality traits. This method provided a more objective perspective by verifying self-reports. The study’s findings revealed that individuals who were less neurotic, more extroverted, and more conscientious generally reported higher life satisfaction across all areas. Conversely, agreeableness and openness to experience exhibited little correlation with life satisfaction.

For the researchers, these findings were unsurprising, particularly the association between lower neuroticism and higher extroversion with increased life satisfaction. However, a closer analysis of the data uncovered more specific traits with a stronger connection to life satisfaction than the Big Five.

For instance, traits like risk-taking, ease in apologising, family commitment, loyalty, respect for authority, enthusiasm for new experiences, and self-improvement correlated positively with life satisfaction. Conversely, individuals who easily made enemies, frequently lied, often forgot things, or cried easily reported lower life satisfaction.

Remarkably, scores on three nuanced personality factors—feeling understood, excitement about life, and ease in decision-making—predicted life satisfaction with 80% accuracy. Among these factors, feeling understood emerged as the most significant predictor.

“The single most important indicator of low life satisfaction is the perception of being misunderstood,” noted the researchers. This insight raises questions about whether fostering greater understanding among individuals could enhance overall life satisfaction. Perhaps feeling understood could alleviate loneliness or isolation.

Despite these intriguing findings, the researchers cautioned against drawing definitive conclusions. Personality traits tend to remain stable throughout our lives and heavily influence our responses to social situations. Relationships aren’t serendipitous; they involve choice and effort. People can undermine relationships by consistently conveying their feelings of being misunderstood.

Though this study encompassed a vast sample size, it doesn’t definitively prove that personality causes high or low life satisfaction. To delve deeper into causality, the researchers examined a subset of participants surveyed on their personalities and life satisfaction a decade ago.

The results surprised even the researchers: even if an individual’s life satisfaction had slightly declined over time, their personality traits from ten years ago still accurately predicted their current life satisfaction. This suggests that the link between personality and life satisfaction endures over time.

“If we wanted to predict someone’s life satisfaction in ten years,” said the researchers, “we could rely on their current personality traits.” However, this isn’t universally true; one out of four participants defied prediction. In some instances, life changes disrupted stability, diminishing personality’s influence on life satisfaction.

In general, many ordinary life events don’t significantly impact happiness as we might expect. This insight carries relevance for us all.

While the notion that our personalities heavily influence our happiness may seem disheartening, it’s not all bleak news. Certain personality traits may render individuals less satisfied despite external circumstances. Conversely, other traits may serve as buffers during challenging times. For example, those with low neuroticism may find silver linings and avoid becoming overwhelmed during stressful situations.

Furthermore, deliberate actions or practices could improve life satisfaction independently of personality traits. Research indicates that well-being practices like gratitude and self-compassion can enhance life satisfaction regardless of personality type.

Although we often perceive personality as fixed, emerging research suggests that personalities can evolve through intentional effort. This notion offers cautious optimism. “I’ve been sceptical about personality change research,” admitted the researchers, “but I’m changing my mind.” There is merit in attempting these changes, and initial findings are promising.

However, transitioning from neurotic to non-neurotic may be challenging. Instead, it might be more realistic to aim for incremental improvements—worrying a little less or feeling slightly less misunderstood. These nuanced traits may be more malleable targets for change than the Big Five.

The traits that predict satisfaction

• Low Neuroticism: Less sensitivity and nervousness.
• High Extroversion: Outgoing and energetic behaviour.
• High Conscientiousness: Efficiency and organisation.
• Risk-Taking: Willingness to engage in new ventures.
• Ease in Apologising: Ability to acknowledge mistakes.
• Family Commitment: Dedication to family relationships.
• Loyalty: Faithfulness to commitments and individuals.
• Respect for Authority: Valuing hierarchical structures.
• Enthusiasm for New Experiences: Eagerness to try new things.
• Self-Improvement: Continuous personal development.
• Feeling Understood: Perception of being comprehended by others.
• Excitement About Life: General enthusiasm for living.
• Ease in Decision-Making: Confidence in making choices.

These traits strongly correlate with life satisfaction, providing insights into improving overall happiness.

We can take solace in knowing that achieving our dream job or relationship won’t necessarily guarantee happiness. Conversely, negative events won’t permanently diminish our happiness either. “Circumstances fluctuate,” remarked the researchers. “On the bright side, negative occurrences likely don’t matter as much as we fear. Your personality can sustain your happiness, enabling you to rebound swiftly.”